One of the Boys

Now don't start crushin'... and pushin'... one another over,
Because you can't see me... I'm one o't'lads now.
I'll tell you all about 'em.

I mix with some boys who put some lots outsite,
They're known as 'The Boys,' and they're what you call wide,
They came to our 'ouse, about three months ago,
They 'aven't gone yet, but I don't mind, oh no!
Because we understand one another,
'Cos I am one of the Boys.
They sleep in my bed whilst I sleep on the floor,
They eat all my food when I'm hungry, oh, lore!
And my wife says that I'm not 'er 'usband no more,
'Cos I'm only one of the Boys.

They're not a bad lot of lads to pal with.
Not when you know 'em...
I've seen them come on Saturday and meet me when I've drawn my wages.
Aye, and... and they've never left me.
And they've given me a shillin' to go and spend...
And then they've invested t'other in't Corporation.
They said they've got a corporation of their own.
And I believe 'em wit' size of 'em...
Get ready...

Our eighteen stone champion's one of our mob,
The other day I said to 'him ''ere I say, Bob,
'Ow do you 'it 'em to knock 'em right out?'
He said, 'why like this,' and he give ma a clout.

Well, whe understand one another,
'Cos I am one of the Boys.
The front of me face, he turned round to my back,
Me left eye was yellow, me right eye was black.
And the wife, when she saw me said 'are you my Jack?'
I said 'no, I'm one of the Boys!'

She 'ad a cheek, an' all, hadn't she?
Ha! She wouldn't 'ave recognised me, because... because I'd gone through me third degree.
Not likely.
I won't have to go through another test like that, I'll be alright...